Peach the Destroyer: Issue 046

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What's this? Peach? Appearing in the comic that bears her name?! Whoda thunk it?! Anyway, I'm excited about this week's comic for two incredibly geeky reasons: 1- I'm probably the only webcomic you've read all week that namedropped a Faraday cage and 2- I got to have someone say (a variation of) "It's magic. I don't have to explain it." So yeah, this is a big week for me. Let's celebrate with my weekly comic reviews, shall we?


WARNING: HERE BE SPOILERS!


I'm trying something different this week: I put the solicit for each issue in with my review. This way, you get some idea of the plot in case I forgot to mention it.

• Aquaman #6
• The Solicit: Who sank Atlantis? Mera, the beautiful Atlantean assassin trained in the Bermuda Triangle, follows a trail of death and deceit to the one man who knows the ugly truth. But what does he want in return for his secrets--and how does it all tie into Mera's own dark past?
• We start with a flashback to...I guess Mera’s assassin training, where she proclaims “Aquaman will die!” This was a pretty big revelation to me considering...well, I’ll be honest, I don’t know a whole lot about Mera, so pretty much anything would’ve been a big revelation to me.
• Trouble comes up when Creepy McGropey tries to cop a feel with Mera in the grocery store and she does the only logical thing she can think of...break his arm. This goes exactly as you’d expect and the crowd turns on her pretty quickly.
• ...and then things get really crazy as Mera starts waterbending like crazy and throwing a royal hissy fit.
• “Aquawoman? Hahaha! You’re scared of Aquawoman, Randy?” I love this comic. I love it good.
• Okay, I’m not going to spoil it for you here, but there’s one scene in particular that will make you walk away with newfound respect for Mera and her powers.
• We learn Mera’s from a colony separate from Atlantis and, by refusing to assassinate Aquaman, she’s cut off from her people.
• The solicit, surprisingly, is kinda true...in its own twisted way. At the end of the issue, Mera returns home and meets up with Aquaman, who says they’re off to see Dr. Stephen Shin, who’s going to tell them who sank Atlantis.
• The Savage Hawkman #6
• The Solicit: Hawkman comes face to face with Jim Craddock, a.k.a. the Gentleman Ghost, a malevolent spirit obsessed with finding an ancient relic called the Mortis Orb. Can Hawkman stop Craddock from using the power of the Orb to unleash hell on Earth?
• That solicit basically covers the first page of this issue. It really makes me wonder how much the writer of that thing had to work with.
• Hey, New 52 Gentleman Ghost has a head, with a face ‘n everything! Granted, we only see it on one page and he keeps to the shadows because the “floating monocol and a tophat” look’s too iconic to ignore, but still.
• So Hawkman goes and finds the Mortis Orb in a cemetery, causing a bunch of corpses to rise up and attack him because...hey, zombies.
• Gentleman Ghost plans to use the Orb to restore his life, triggering a Zombie Apocalypse as a byproduct. The issue ends with the tease “Hawkman battles an army of the dead!” so...yeah. There’s that.
• Justice League Dark #6
• The Solicit: Enchantress has been subdued, but this team of misfits hardly knows how to celebrate when each is still wrestling with their own demons. While Zatanna and Constantine try to decide on their next steps, Deadman deals with his loss, and Shade the Changing Man tries to bring Mindwarp back from the edge of sanity.
• Madame Xanadu tries to get the Justice League Dark team together in a more...traditional manner. Namely the old “tell x people they have a one-on-one meeting with me and let wacky sitcom hijinks ensue!”
• I think with this new, slightly more traditional, take on Justice League Dark will be good for it. Sure, the team’s disgruntled, bitter, and will go through more growing pains than if Justice League International were comprised of nothing but a batch of Guy Gardner and Booster Gold clones, but that’s half the fun! I’m excited for this book now!
• I’m not, however, excited that this book is crossing over with I, Vampire. That’s one of those DC books I’m happy to pretend don’t actually exist.
• The Fury of Firestorm #6
• The Solicit: In the blink of an eye, Ronnie and Jason witness a horror so gruesome, the two young Firestorms will question their entire futures as superheroes. As if that wasn't enough, Pozhar, the Russian Firestorm, shows the two boys exactly how dangerous their world has become.
• ...okay, so...first four pages have our Firestorms dealing with 2000 people dying. Let that sink in because that’s probably the single most messed-up sentence I’ll type tonight.
• Actually, the whole issue’s about dealing with that event. Pozhar drops in and goads them and, after Ronnie and Jason beat each other up, Ronnie runs off to settle the score with Pozhar and Jason’s on the run from the law. It’s an action-heavy issue that feels like the prologue to a much darker story.
• Superman #6
• The Solicit: Recently, an onslaught of creatures has targeted Superman, nearly destroying Metropolis in the process. And now...Superman is helping them finish the job?! Guest-starring Supergirl!
• So...this issue wraps up George Perez’ run on the title. A lot of this feels like an epilogue and...I think Supergirl’s appearance may have been a little unnecessary (was the world really clamoring for a scene where Superman beat Supergirl to a pulp?). Everything kinda goes where you expect it to...fake Superman beats on Supergirl, real Superman beats on fake Superman, real Superman tosses fake Superman’s bits ‘n pieces into the sun. Y’know, same old same old.
• I know I keep harping on it, but a lot of this story feels reminiscent of Superman’s story in Wednesday Comics. And, now that it’s completed, I think I can safely say I actually like this story a bit more (bear in mind, it’s been a good year or so since I read my copy of Wednesday Comics). All the loose plot threads tie up nicely (maybe a bit too nicely since Perez is off the title), leaving us with a (mostly) fresh slate for the new creative team to take over next month.
• Teen Titans #6
• The Solicit: In the aftermath of their battle with Superboy, the Teen Titans make a horrifying discovery: Kid Flash has been knocked out of synch! If they are going to save their teammate, the badly beaten and battered teens need to sneak into the New York branch of S.T.A.R. Labs.
• Our first page has Kid Flash debating grammar (sorry, I really couldn’t pass up an excuse to use that link).
• In the aftermath of the Teen Titans/Superboy superbrawl, the Titans have to run from the police and help Bart Allen with his power issues (wow...I just realized I basically re-wrote part of the solicit. Sorry).
• I’m very pleased to see the appearance of Virgil Hawkins/Static in this comic...especially considering the public fallout that happened regarding the behind-the-scenes goings-on that lead to his own book’s cancellation.
• Oh, and we also meet the very annoying Grymm. I can tell he’s annoying because he has a messed-up jagged mouth, no lips, and it’s impossible for you to figure out how he talks. Also, he uses the same joke twice in one page.
• Going back to Virgil, I like his characterization in this issue. Bear in mind, I’m not too familiar with him outside of the cartoon, so seeing him running around like a Time Lord genius is pretty awesome.
• Oh, Kid Flash gets a new costume to save his life.
• The Ray #3 (of 4)
• The Solicit: Lucien can rescue Chanti from the clutches of the Isopods, but can he save his relationship with her? More important, can he save her family from the evil Director, who wants to destroy everything for his art?
• The Ray battles a TRON villain. I wish I got to type sentences like that more often, because that’s awesome. Seriously, this guy needs his own ongoing series. Need more? Here’s his origin story, in his own words: “Was it crazy to be reborn from a hundred yards of thirty-five millimeter film that was bathed in a Lazarus Pit?” How did anyone think a character this rich would only work in a miniseries?!
• Anyway, TRON guy wants The Ray to be the star of his movie. It’s a whole thing.

Well, that wraps things up for this week. I'll see you same time next week for more crazy Peach the Destroyer action!